Oh hey! Sometimes, it’s fun to play a game I like to call “Best Case/Worst Case.” I know that sounds a lot like Best Day/Worst Day from Looking For Alaska, but I assure you, it’s nothing like that.
Whenever I was worried/nervous/excited about something, Mum would always ask me, “Well, what’s the worst that could happen?” I appreciate that this was supposed to make me feel better, but I have a very vivid imagination so it would always end with me sobbing something incoherent about homelessness. Thusly, I invented Best Case/Worst Case, because it makes me laugh and laughing always helps.
First, I imagine the worst that could happen. Then, I imagine the absolute best thing that could happen. Then, I imagine what would probably happen. Here’s an example.
I’m pretty nervous about the play I’m in on Wednesday. Best Case/Worst Case time!
Worst Case Scenario: The day of the play, I’m asked to fill in for a role because someone couldn’t show up, and I forget all my lines and then I get distracted because I’m forgetting all my lines, and then I fall on my face and I start crying and everyone laughs at me and my reputation is forever ruined and then I go crazy because everyone hates me and I decide to kill all of humanity by inventing a zombie disease that turns everyone into zombies and everyone turns into zombies and I realize that I killed everyone and I’m depressed and then I kill myself.
Best Case Scenario: I’m totally freaking awesome and I don’t forget any of my lines and then my teacher Kelby says that a college called her and offered me a full-ride scholarship and then in a few years, I go to the college and I’m absolutely awesome and I have a boyfriend who invents a jetpack and then woohoo! Jetpack! And I fly into the sky on my jetpack and then I write an awesome book and also I’m a really awesome actress, and then yeah.
Probably what will happen: I might forget one or two of my lines, but it’s okay because all the lines I have are lines I say with other people, so no one will notice, and I might trip and fall, but it would probably be funny, ’cause one time my friend Rhea was in a play and she bowed and her wig fell off and it was hilarious and after the play was over, she was all, “Oh my God, did you see that? That wasn’t supposed to happen.” Only it totally looked like it was supposed to happen because the play was funny anyway and it totally looked awesome. So maybe I fall, but it would be funny, and then I finish the play and get all happy and glowy on the inside and there are group hugs all around and yaaaaaay!
After I play Best Case/Worst Case, I realize that I don’t even want the best case one to happen, because I’d rather have the life I have than have a genius jetpacking boyfriend. I suppose the moral should be “Be happy the way you are,” but really it’s “At least you’re not responsible for the Zombie Holocaust.” Or maybe it’s both. According to An Abundance of Katherines, it’s fine to have two morals in a story, so yes. Be happy the way you are and you could always be responsible for the Zombie Holocaust.
Awesome: Thea created a new blog, which you can find at msinsanity.wordpress.com. She’s still editing the layout and stuff, but you should check it out ’cause she rules.
Unawesome: The number of run-on sentences in this post. C’est la vie.